Meeting people is hard.  Whether you’re looking for a long-term relationship or a “good time not a long time,” putting yourself out there is a stressful ordeal.  For so long, people’s only options were those they had an opportunity to meet in person. This meant a lot of time was spent at bars, getting set up with people your friends “know you’ll hit it off with,” and wondering if you should tell your date you’re not calling back.

Today, there is another option: online dating. Tinder is the leading dating site on the market, with 50 million users (This according to “Tinder by the Numbers: Stats, Users, Demographics & Fun Facts” from MuchNeeded.com).  Popular because of its versatility, Tinder is likely the way to get in contact with the most people the fastest.

Bumble is not the next most popular site. That honor goes to Grindr, with 27 million users.  However, Bumble (22 million users) is the most comparable, as it is the next most popular app for anyone, where Grindr is designed only for men to meet other men.

So which is better: Tinder or Bumble?

Of course, this depends on the person.  In response to the complaint of creepy men on Tinder, Bumble has it set so that. in heterosexual matches, the woman must send the first message.  (In same sex matches, either party may start the conversation.)  For some, this is a selling point.

“It is helpful to those who identify as women in feeling comfortable,” CJ Colbert explained.

For most who spoke to The Mirror, however, it was a harsh detractor. User @jamielizm on Twitter offered, “Messaging first because I’m a woman sucks, so f*ck Bumble.”  Abby Lewis explained that forcing a girl to reply first “feels aggressively heteronormative.”

Those who did prefer Bumble rarely mention the aspect of girls messaging first.  Stevie Leigh, who met her boyfriend on Bumble, mentioned the stigma of men on Tinder, the more detailed prompts on Bumble (as opposed to Tinder’s free-form bio system) and even the ability to list her favorite Spotify artists on your profile. She never mentioned the need to message him first.

One plus of the app: Bumble has you state up front what you’re looking for and tries to match you with people accordingly.  The app offers options for people looking for dates, friends and business connections. User @Jlynnmoss on Twitter said “I’ve only tried Bumble for the friends feature and that was enjoyable.  I think it’s neat that they have different ways to use their app.”

There are, however, better opportunities for gender non-conforming individuals on Tinder.

Colbert explained, “Tinder is greatly accessible to non-binary people, since it actually has multiple gender options rather than male or female… Bumble [is] very binary based.”

Jade Sause offers a warning for non-binary people on Tinder, however.

“I’ve only used Tinder.  I don’t think it is accessible at all [for non-binary people],” said Sause.

They explained that because of a lack of understanding and cultural awareness of non-binary people it made them feel like they “have to justify [their] existence to other people.”

If you’re looking to get yourself out there, you’ll likely consider dating apps.  Hopefully this is a helpful resource for you to try and decide how you’d like to pursue those interests.  Always remember that at the end of the day, you are amazing as you are, and no matter how you choose to chase after romance, don’t let the difficult parts of that chase drag you down.

Article written by Jacob Maher.